Monday, August 25, 2008

On Being Evicted.

So I got evicted today.

Kinda sucks.

So, fear not, I have until Oct 1. to find a new residence. It's not like my things are on the lawn and I'm sleeping in the car.

It's not really my problem, (except I have to find a new place to live) it just seems I got caught in the middle of a feud between two angry lesbians and my heretofore cool landlord.

The story goes: I'll give the bridged version: The other two roommates never got along with my heretofore cool landlord. Recently there have been some plumbing issues in the bathroom. Drains needing to be snaked, toilet water cascading into the basement, mystery water bubbling up around the base of the sink (wholly unrelated to the toilet incident since, given the uneveness of the floor the sink is actually substantially uphill of the toilet.) For all intents and purposes all of the plumbing in the bathroom decided to shit the bed within the span of about three weeks. Instead of, perhaps figuring out what the problems what the problems were and dealing with them (ie, trying several home or over the counter remedies for clogged pipes(which I did); finding the source of the sink mystery water(which I also did)) and then doing something about it(which I had Brett, the heretofore cool landlord's boyfriend/rental unit caretaker, do.) the irrational angry lesbians basically went straight for threatening a lawsuit. Emails were sent. Hilarity ensued. As the dust settles, it turns out I have 30 days to arrange a new living situation. I'm taking this all in stride. I sort of wanted away from the lesbians, as they always seemed to be ill, rarely leave the house, and generally suck the energy out of every carbon based life form they encounter. I've also, for a variety of reasons, been considering calling it quits on Minneapolis and seeing what some other part of the country holds for me. Maybe Colorado.

This might just be the Universe trying to tell me something.

And in defense of the heretofore cool landlord. She is actually still cool. She told me, apologizing the whole way. She acknoweldges that none of this is of my making, and I'm a great renter, but she can't go ahead and start the whole eviction process on 2/3rds of a rental unit, and she'll happily provide a glowing recommendation in the future. I'm relly only angry with the roommates for handling the situation like children with lawyers.

Wednesday, July 2, 2008

A wonderful thing.

I just clicked on the Weather Underground link in my bookmarks for Minneapolis weather, and instead of typing in Westport, CT, or Beaver Dam, WI, or Olympia, WA, I actually am looking to see what the weather will be tomorrow in Minneapolis.

And what a forecast, kids.

Thursday, June 26, 2008

Gone Camping

I will be in the mountains for a few days. Please leave a message.

Sunday, June 15, 2008

It's time for this weeks installment

Of Everyone's Favorite Game:

Chameleon Or Stick?!?!?!?

So, contestants, which is it?

Mmmm. Bacon.

Wednesday, June 11, 2008

Grudgingly, I heart NY

I didn't think that I would. I was there in college but remember startlingly little of the city. Saturday night when we first arrived it was hot, sticky, and after learning our AC unit was broke, I was not happy. But Sunday we crashed on the Upper West Side at a staffer's mom's place I started to come around.

Things I learned about NYC:

Nobody has any expectations of efficiency when driving in Manhattan. Thus, rules of the road do not even vaguely apply. Lanes markers are for decoration while lights, and signage are mere suggestions. Turns out you can double or even triple park just about anywhere, so long as you're not completely blocking traffic. This is helpful when driving a giant fish there. Cops tend not to give a shit unless you're actively killing or mugging somebody.

The NY Subway system carries over 5 million rides EVERY DAY. That's 5,000,000. That is equivalent to the State of Minnesota in a day. That's roughly 2 BILLION rides annually. That's more rides than all other transit systems in the US COMBINED. It's staggering. And also breathlessly efficient.

There is cheap beer to be found in Manhattan if you know where to look.

Yeah, I sort of like the place.

Monday, June 2, 2008

Why Liberals Always Lose #3

Those who can, do; those who can't, teach. Those who can't tell their asshole from their elbow, work for a liberal nonprofit.

Friday, May 30, 2008

A User's Manual to Road Show Language

Country Livin': Sittn' in an RV with the screen door. Generally involves beer.

Gong Show: A situation so ridiculous that you wish someone could bang on a gong and make it stop.

The Rig: The RV, with salmon attatched.

Celebrating Gold Rush Heritage: Spending time in the "Old" part of town. Originated: Old Sac (Sacramento) Other uses: Old Sag (Saginaw), Old Harry (Old Harrisburg) Generally involves beer.

Rig Food: Anything that can be prepared in an RV. Usually originates in part or in whole from a can. Generally involves beer.

Jeri: The bite in the ass girl hanging out with the attractive and interesting girl. Originated: Reno.

Super Fan: Suburban Dad with mustache and a belly that reflects the amount of beer and polish saahsage he's consumed over the years. Orginated: Chicago.

Why Liberals Always Lose #2

They send important information via email to a guy that doesn't own a computer.

Thursday, May 29, 2008

No Country for Old Penguins

Wings had to drop one to win in 5 at the Joe.

(Image gleefully stolen from Buster)

When I'm made of tired

And traveling partner #1 is developing a bad habit of wandering off for hours at a time, and traveling partner #2 is constantly on the internet, yet still unable to give coherent directions, I get cranky. When nobody thinks we should get gas in Harrisburg, even though we're below a half tank, because there's a place 40 miles away that is out of gas when we get there, leaving us with less than 1/4 tank, I get cranky. When I can't use the internet access that was purchased for this trip, I get cranky. When I can't go fishing, I get cranky.

Monday, May 19, 2008

Fuck Pebble Mine

This is the worst idea ever.

Fuck them. Ideally with something barbed and rusting.

Saturday, May 17, 2008

I hate Illinois Nazis.

Lombard, IL needs to be plowed under and allowed to lie fallow until it will grow something other than fascists. Honestly, this is the worst place I've been on this tour. Fascists and strip malls. Hell on Earth.

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Two Blogs is Hard.

Now that I am the administrator for this blog, as well as the shop blog, it's hard to keep up. a

Monday, May 12, 2008

Great Tits Cope Well With Warming.

While poking around my news feeds this morning, I found that headline filed by the BBC Being the BBC, I was somewhat let down when I clicked the link.

Friday, May 2, 2008


Went tip to cork with this one on Pyramid Lake in Nevada. First Cutthroat trout I've ever caught, and biggest trout EVER. Awesome.


Tuesday, April 29, 2008

Reno Blows.


We had to cancel our event this morning because wind gusts of 70MPH (!) were possible in the Washoe valley. I just walked back from a coffee shop and couldn't walk in a straight line. There has been some earthquake activity in Reno lately, and I can't tell if it's the wind or the ground shaking the RV around. It's kind of fun.

Monday, April 28, 2008

My best press yet.

No, this one is serious. There's a great article from Chico, CA in which I'm the star.

Pretty neat.

Sunday, April 27, 2008

Sand In Weird Places

I went swimming in a real live ocean today. Yes it was cold. But no colder than the Great Lakes in spring. Couldn't stay in long. But, boy is it easy to float in that salty stuff. I mean, you hardly have to work to swim around.

In related news, I'm sunburnt.

Friday, April 25, 2008

Sac, and related news.

I'm going to contradict something I said recently. And this might sound a little weird. I like Sacramento. This might make me crazy, but let me put a finer point to it. I like Midtown Sacramento. It kind of reminds me of the perfect mix of South Minneapolis and Kalamazoo. Only warmer. The rest of the city and it's environs are ensconced in a soul-crushing heap of suck. But there is a little neighborhood just east of Downtown that is pretty groovy. You know just good honest folk, tending toward a younger twenty-something crowd. None of your San Fran "We're God's Gift to North America" Or Berkley's "If I see one more 'coexist' bumper sticker, I will strangle you in your own prayer flags, you damned hippy" or San Diego's "Whoa, Dude!" or LA's "The Midwest? That's totally 'thar be, like, dragons'" Just a neighborhood where real people live. Perhaps the only ones in the damned state.

And in the overshare of the decade: trust me, it sucks.

Monday, April 21, 2008

On Seismology

How's this for wierd:

Sitting in San Francisco reading about earthquakes in the Midwest.


So I'm in San Francisco. I'm not impressed. Which makes it official. There is no city in California that registers above a "Meh" on the Bill scale. The scenery in California, however, is beautiful.


Other than that, I've been busy.

Crazybusy. I've also been on the TV, but I have yet to get a digital copy of thse files.

Tuesday, April 15, 2008

Eating undercooked beef is hazardous to your health.


When I say I want it rare, I mean I want it RARE.

Monday, April 14, 2008

The Land of Milk and Honey

Portland, Oregon.

I haven't been in this town since I was 14. I always had the impression that I would really like this Burg. My suspicions were confirmed today. First off, the rig and the giant fish is parked right off a streetcar line. Streetcars! effective transit! Second, I'm using totally free city-wide wireless to upload this post. Put it on the shortlist. I could live here.

In other news, we're working hard. We had a lovely night at a volunteer's house on Saturday. They kept feeding us wine and we stayed up way too late. Their kitters really took a liking to me, and me to them. Except that when I woke up, my allergy kicked in strong and my right eye. Total Quasimodo. We then spent a day at the zoo where the big fish was mobbed by children. Birth Control. It's a good thing.

Saturday, April 12, 2008

Why Liberals Always Lose.

They plan a nation-wide road trip but don't have a plan to pay for gas.

'Nuff Said.

Wednesday, April 9, 2008


We're on TeeVee in Seattle

That's my partner in crime Nate. You can see me milling about, as well as jumping out of the giant salmon.

Thank god for the nice fisherman down on the wharf who helped me back that thing in there. I'm not good a backing a trailer up quite yet, but the salty ol' dude helped me by yelling "TURN LEFT. . .OK NOW TURN RIGHT. OK, STRAIGHT IN." It was fun.

There will be clip where I'm talking. Maybe a radio clip, too. I'll link them as I get them.

Otherwise we've been busy. Busy busy busy.

Saturday, April 5, 2008

Seattle in the morning time.

I didn't sleep. That much was planned. Took a cab to the airport. Flew Sun Country, which meant that I got to see the lovely HHH Terminal, or "The Hump" A nice little terminal with only about 10 gates. Sure beats trying to march to gate G-423,788 at Lindberg. Sun Country, very nice airline. Quite impressed.

Then I got to Seattle. Things went poorly from here. Right away, I realized I forgot my raincoat, because it was, of course, raining. I was going to be taking the express bus from the airport. Now, when I hear of the express bus from airport, I was expecting an express bus from the airport. In reality it was just a bus. It apparently made many stops before arriving at the airport, because it was already full. And don't even think about taking the express bus from the airport if you have the gall to travel with luggage. Man did those people give me the stink-eye. One woman just looked, shook her head. So I'm standing in the front of the bus with my luggage with precisely nowhere to go. Luckily the driver folded up one of the weelchair seats so I (and the others coming from the airport with luggage) could stash it somewhere.

Then I asked the bus driver where to catch "The Sounder" to Everett, where I would be collected by my aunt and uncle. The driver told me to get off at "Rywmlafl hgeighnf." Not understandig what he meant by "Rywmlafl hgeighnf" I asked again. Again "Rywmlafl hgeighnf" As this so called express chugs along (it went on the freeway for a spell, which is why it is called "express") it collected more people. It wasn't until the very end of the line that the bus was even remotely empty enough for me to be able to exit with all of my belongings. By that time, I was informed that I had missed "Rywmlafl hgeighnf" But I could also catch The Sounder close by. He directed me to somewhere over there, he pointed.

Now I followed his directions to a bus stop. Here is where I made my biggest mistake. See, when I have taken The Sounder before to Tacoma, I was on a train. I thought the one to Everett was, likewise a train. I even did my homework, there is a train to Everett. Trains don't stop at bus stops. I was confused. Standing for several minutes in the rain in somewhere in Seattle I considered my options. I needed to regroup. And get rid of some of this baggage. So I headed to the one place where I knew people in Seattle. The office. Luckily the office is very close to the Space Needle, making navigating to it somewhat easy. This was, however, a mile walk, with three months worth of luggage in hilly Seattle.

I hoofed it out. No problem. Called the office so they knew I was coming. But coming up the last curb to the office, the handle to my very rickety rolly suitcase exploded in my hand. I was left holding the plastic handle, one of the metal bars ejected itself from the luggage and the other seemed to be now permanently stuck in the up position.

So now with broken luggage, sweaty and wet from the rain. I make it to the office. So much for first impressions. I quickly fished out my Lappy and figured out my mistake. The train, being a commuter train, only runs at rush hours. Thus trying to catch one at 11 am wasn't an effective plan. I was looking for another express bus. Which is why I was directed to a bus stop. Oh well.

So, a couple of bus rides later I was happily in Everett, WA and collected by my Aunt in her shiny new red VW Beetle. And quite happy to be done with that ordeal.

Back on the Blog Wagon.

Hey Campers.

So I've once again become "functionally homeless" time to start blogging again. So now the joint will go back to what it was intended to be. A travelogue. Detailing the exploits that I can't put on the company blog.